Mission Mary

After Spring Break I decided that the ballers (and Julie) should set out on the most noble endeavor of rating all of the mexican establishments in Tuscaloosa on their margarita quality. Selfless, I know, this project will provide knowledge and assistance for generations to come. We drew a map, found out happy hour times and established a four pepper ranking scale. One pepper- sick nasty stick with water. Two peppers- didn't hate it, didn't love it. Three peppers- bring me another. Four peppers- El Rincon gloriousness. We have trudged through an embarrassing amount of chips and salsa, suffered through dry chicken, requested the peppers and onions that were sadly missing, and consumed an ungodly amount of glorious tequila calories. I'll give you a rundown of where we have visited thus far:

1. Pepitos on the strip- home of the "free squeezed lime margaritas." This claim I can vouch for because as I waited for the sketchy bathroom I saw like Pepe juicing limes like there was no tomorrow. The three dollar price is pretty standard but the size is smaller than El Rincon's. Although tasty and delicious there wasn't that initial punch we were expecting. Notice I said initial. Because we felt like we were cheating on mr rincon we only purchased one and headed down the road to the our old faithful mexican joint. As we were walking the initial punch that was missing definitely made itself know. Score: 1 initially, 2 with aftershock.

2. Don Rafa's- interestingly enough we learned about this hidden gem in our baptist church. With a much smaller selection, margs can be purchased in a small size for $3 or a large for $6. The best thing about this place is the food but make sure Don knows exactly what you want to order or you could be stuck with an odd smelling tortilla boat when you are expecting a delicious pile of peppers and onions. Score: 3 peppers; delicious taste, smaller size.

3. Margarita's Grille- that sketchy yellow building off McFarland. If you looking for a rocking atmosphere keep on driving. We went on a Tuesday because that is when they decide to half off their beverages (I'm not going broke for this mission) and walked into what seemed to be family night. Not to be deterred we ordered us a round. Margarita's Grille offers the widest variety- raspberry, strawberry, pina colada, vanilla? The price is the same but the punch is not. The chicken was also found to be dry. Margarita's Grille its time for a name change. Score: 2.5; props for the selection.

4. El Rincon- the gold standard, the holy grail of margarita's and our personal favorite thus far. What bad thing can be said about our ever faithful Mr Rincon? They have the most happy hours and the coveted blue margarita- the strongest of the bunch as admitted by our waiter. Might I recommend a frozen strawberry/mango or a blue/mango aka a bango for those in the know. Mr Rincon has been there during rush misery and for HESI celebrations. Score: 4 peppers, they never let you down.

We're halfway down with the margarita marathon with Lupe's, Los Tarascos, Los Calientes and Jalapenos remaining. Our amazing map can be found outside of the squirrel palace for reference. You don't have to thank us... its our selfless senior gift.

6 weeks. 6 weeks left. It is unbelievable that most of our friends, including myself will be graduating in 6 short weeks. I could blog about all of the things I am going to miss, but I think these things are obvious, and that blog would be depressing. Instead, I am going to tell you some of the things I am looking forward to.

I do love the tree house and what it has to offer (maid service, bed making service once a week, convenience to class, and well...that's about it), but I am more than looking forward to my own apartment, my own space, and well a few other "luxuries"

1. My own parking space: I am going to enjoy the "luxury" of parking in a spot, in front of my home, running as many errands as I want, and then returning to that same parking spot, no matter what season or time of day.
2. A closet that can house my entire wardrobe
3. My own shower, free of others' filth and well...other feminine things.
4. My own kitchen, for cooking my own meals, and one that random people won't wander around in for hours, loitering in front of my cups.
5. speaking of loitering, there will be no loiterers or unwanted guests in my space.
6. my own television, on which I will watch a show anytime I like.
7. a washer and dryer that I will have access to 24/7 , and if I want to leave my clothes in the dryer for 10 extra minutes, that's okay.
8. silence. that is all.
9. a thermostat that actually works.
10. a sleeping environment that doesn't involve a giant whole in the wall that lets in bugs, wind, outside temperature, and "dirty air"
11. A QUEEN SIZE BED.
12. a cabinet full of cleaning supplies, which i will use to clean my own space, and I can also use these to maintain a level of cleanliness which I find appropriate.
13. finally, INTERNET THAT WORKS 365 DAYS A YEAR!

I'm sure there are many more "luxuries" that I have taken for granted through the years, but I will definitely appreciate them more now. I will miss the tree house; not for what it has to offer, but instead for the people who live in it. Love you ladies of the 2nd floor!

As seen on tv life

During a recent night on the town with Lolly conversation began to lag at one point in the night and I found my eyes wandering towards one of the TV's in the bar. Instead of selecting from the numerous sporting events offered I was drawn to the infomercials. These marathon-like advertisements can be found hawking things from wrap around HD glasses to a deli pro knife. I could write a whole blog devoted to the multiple hair products offered- bump its, EZ combs, total hair makeover kit, hairagami and the hair coloring brush. Thats just to work with the hair you have. There is a whole different world of hair removal products- smooth away, wizzit hair remover, nair, nads, hair removal foam, microtweezer, and the tweeze. If you bought all of these products I feel as though you would look something like this...

Hair products barely take a dip in the pool of as seen on tv products. As I find the need to avoid studying for italian, food science or the incredibly difficult swimming I may add to this study of useless, overpriced crap that every hoarder is dying to have. 

Forecast: Deathly Umbrellas

8AM: My alarm goes off. I, like a newborn, struggle to open my eyes and eventually silence the beeping in my ear. Then I hear it. tap. tap. tap tap tap. What is this sound you might ask? rain. lots of rain. All I want to do at this point is turn over and fall back into a deep slumber. But No, I get up, get dressed, and face the rain any way.

WHY? AM I MENTALLY UNBALANCED? IT'S A JUNGLE OUT THERE! Here are my observations about rain, most specifically about umbrellas.

1. Freaks come out in the rain: people seem to be lost when it rains. Everything is now 10 times harder to accomplish. most people react like southerners in an "ice storm", tip-toeing around puddles, trying not to face plant into these dangerous pits of water. My advice: MOVE OUT OF MY WAY! you are not going to fall if you are wearing proper footwear and you know, most of you are wearing leggings so they will dry super fast if and when you fall in that puddle.

2. Umbrellas: I must preface this rant with a confession: I Loathe Umbrellas. Always Have. Always Will. Why do everyone's umbrellas have to be the size of three people. one person one umbrella. the end. I spend the majority of my time in the rain dodging people and their huge umbrellas. I feel as if sunglasses would be useful so my eyes will not be gouged out by the spikes on the ends of the tent you are using to block the rain from your body.

3. Water: Rain is water and water is rain. You will not melt...or die...if you get wet. All that will happen is a little sogginess of the pants and frizzy hair.

Further Advice: Ditch the umbrella and get a jacket for the safety of those around you. Peace.

Freshman

Freshman... we've all been one. As a wise old senior I have come to notice a few things about these curious creatures. It has been interesting to watch them evolve over the year from clueless children wandering around campus like blind little mice to clueless 18 year olds stomping around campus like they own the place. Don't confuse this as a rant against those precious little youngsters for I greatly appreciate them for providing me with endless hours of entertainment. Exhibit A- unnamed freshman in the dining room at alpha gam... as I meandered downstairs to get my customary oatmeal I notice two little freshies loading their plates with bacon, egg and cheese sandwiches. I overhear one say, "I have never been up this early before in my life." I have several questions I wanted to ask said freshman. 1) did you not go to high school or did you live in an alternate reality where hs did not start around 8am? 2) have you ever been at work, the gym, the hospital, city cafe and seen the sunrise? no? then you my friend are not up early. These sweet, innocent and naive babes need to redefine their definition of early. Yes, I realize we are in college and classes before 10 am are considered a crime but don't even think about complaining to me or the scores of nursing and nutrition majors I know about being up early. Exhibit B- the influx of freshman at the rec... as spring rolls around and the blessed week known as Spring Break draws near the rec swells with copious amounts of freshman. Did they just discover this massive building? The wide eyes on all of their faces are slightly terrifying. Do they know how to use the equipment? Are they going to fall while running on the track taking me out with them? Will they clog up my way to the water fountain while waiting on their precious Zumba class for 30 minutes? And finally, will they drive like a toddler on some phonebooks around the parking lot in order to shave .2 seconds off of their walk into the gym. You're going to work out so the extra 10 steps should be an added bonus. I'll have to ponder more freshman observations for a later date but as a safety conscious blogger I feel that I should make all of our 2 readers aware of the imminent danger these little lambs present.

distractions...DON'T YA JUST LOVE EM!

So, It's exam week. I have my 7th and final theory exam tomorrow, so what am I doing you ask? blogging. I would be studying , but certain things are hindering my intake of useless knowledge about theory.

1. GNATS: These stupid little bugs have been circling around my head all week. hundreds of them. what could attract them to my lair of knowledge you ask? well, in addition to the fact that we live in a tree house, many things. Maybe these little creatures enjoy my hairspray, perhaps the smell of jewie's latkes are still wafting off of my clothing, or maybe, just maybe, these little annoyances want my beloved study snacks. All of these excuses are unacceptable. The death toll is up to 3 gnats, and it will rise soon.

2. ILLNESS: When I have to lysol my living space 3 times a day, something is wrong. All i ask is that you take meds or at least put your germy little hand to your mouth when you cough. Then walk your nasty body to the bathroom and wash said germy hand with warm water and soap. you learned this is kindergarten. Maybe your brain is filled with more important things now, like which brand of peanut butter is better than the other...but I will tell you, that knowledge will get you nothing more than a sandwich!

3. FACEBOOK: Why is the site so addictive? I find myself stalking people I haven't thought of in years. "Why hello long lost elementary school boyfriend!...300 tagged pictures!!...don't mind if i do!"...this is the best distraction! because a study break can turn into 3 hours of meaningless staring at pictures of your ex boyfriend's sister's cat who looks great in his peter pan costume that came with a matching green hat that stays secured to his head with a small piece of elastic...or just writing dumb comments on your friend's wall because you know that she too, is on facebook...and of course not studying.......GOOD LUCK ON EXAMS!!!

My take on France

I have recently returned from a trip across the pond to lovely France. It should be pointed out now that I do not speak French besides the key phrase "Parlevous ingles?" So, I entered this beautiful country as the ignorant and uniformed American. On the seven and a half hour flight to Paris I thought it would a better idea to watch three movies than to sleep. So, needless to say when we arrived at 11:30 am I was less than chipper. After being told by the customs man that I look like Ke$ha I set off to get some euros from the atm only to discover I did not know how to use a European atm. Once I finally had my fake looking money I headed to the buses- the advised way to get to downtown Paris. The head and shoulder shampoo needing, non english speaking friends I made on the cattle car, I mean public transit, told me I was a good person because I did not get upset when the pumped into me. Is it normal in France for an accidental run in to be met with a knock down drag out fight?  After a nice man helped me find my proper subway I sprinted away to my next train- hey I've seen the movie Taken- I finally found our house for the next two nights. In a continuance of my genius I decided instead of sleeping I would take on Paris by myself. Three hours and twenty seven blisters later I found my way back to the house and proceeded to pass out on the bed- over 24 hours since I had last slept. France being the amazing place it is I had a wonderful time on my trip. the Louvre was awesome and Normandy was inspiring but the main thing I want to discuss is this little European contraption called a bidet. This can only be described as a the product of a toilet, shower and water fountain having a child. It can be found in many bathrooms directly by the toilet. I had to consult wikipedia as to the proper use for this odd looking contraption- basically its a way to get everything all clean. Now they are getting really progressive and combining a toilet and a bidet... woa dream big! I'm sorry France I think I'll do as the Charmin Bears do and leave the high pressure wash downs to you.